Never had I expected one more failure
To my ill heart it was an aggravating factor
It stopped beating, entrapping my dreams
I shouted for them, but heart was obstinate…
I wanted to stab it, to cut it open
But the hard hit injured my soul…
With a hardened heart and wounded soul
I started wandering to pacify my pain
Flowers asked me to have some scent…
I refused; to me thorns were more pleasant.
Clouds came to lure me for rains of hopes…
I knew no hopes, my eyes were raining.
My verve was flowing with the flood of emotions
My emotions were nothing but a sense of faced negations
Then wind came to blow my mind…
Punctured with my feelings; it was resistant
Gentle sunrays wanted to caress me…
I was too inflamed; warmth raised a wildfire
My thoughts were burning my frozen life
My emotions were ice cool, apathetic was my mind
Birds were chirping, calling me to have some fun…
I thought like my fate, of me they were making fun
Moon arrived then, with his dark girlfriend…
I envied it, it had many twinkling friends.
I was alone, trapped in myself
My shouts were inaudible, even to ears of mine
Tired was the nature, and so were the nocturnal beasts
I was stubborn, stuck to my fate’s darkness.
Not afraid of the reptiles and wandering hunters,
I wanted to taste the poison, or sharpness of paws and canines
Shouting owls had now replaced the chirpers
And like my thoughts, trees were making dance of ghosts
I was the ghost, desiring to kill me…
No other servant of death was ready to overtake me.
My dreams were buried, somewhere in forest of my mind
And they were scared, not of the forest but of my dreamless mind
I was scared of unknown things, of the future or past memories
Scared to an extent, I wasn’t afraid of halting to survive.
I requested the darkness, the hunters and killers to let me to die
… But no one dared to face my mind’s fire.
I spit on the moon and stoned the stars,
Nothing happened… they were far apart
I kept on weeping with my dried eyes,
Now there was no water, like the desert of my mind
Blindfolded to any happiness,
My eyes were unable to penetrate the darkness
Ears were engaged in cries of wolves,
Mute was the whistle of rustling leaves
I didn’t want any angel to come,
To touch my heart and wipe out all pains
Never did I expect some magic to happen
To convert the night into a beautiful dawn
…But the dawn was destined to arrive,
It was my luck that I continued to survive…
I got everything the angel and the magic,
My heart opened up to release the seized dreams…