Tuesday, April 27, 2010

Sometimes I envy easy animal lives

Sometimes I envy easy animal lives
Their simplicity and lack of desires
They do what the nature tells
Don’t bother if their attempt fails
Never think of failures and successes
Just go on doing what life demands
Not trapped in morals and principles
They take life as it comes
Never have the things called goals
They aim only for their basic needs

My needs in contrast are unending
For my goals I keep my life on pending
I forget the basic needs to reach my aims
My aims aim all of my happiness
Success is something taking me to my goals
And failures push me some steps away from them
Away from my goals, I crave for them
I burn my life for the things I desire

Nature signals the animals to make some changes
I resist the nature, I hate changes
The nature hates me in this way
From normality I get pushed away and away
For me the pyramid of needs is also reversed
I don’t want food but the happiness of the universe
For me everything is very complex
I spend years in considering pros and cons of them
Shooting for my goals is also not easy
Fear of failure is ready to kill me

Animals get happy with simplest achievements
For me, things except my goals are not achievements
For I’ve a part of brain called neocortex
And my limbic system is enslaved by it
So are my centers for breathing, living and sleep
In other words I’ve got haunted by my goals
My heart beats my goals and lungs respire to them
Eyes search for them and ears hear them
My goals are the only songs I utter
The only fragrance I smell and the only joy I enjoy

My goals are ruthless, they keep on calling me
And I like a haunted child keep on following them
Even when I know, they push me in valleys of depression
Or make me to get lost in deserts of loneliness
There I forget myself and search fulfillment in them
As if I’ve learned to get happiness from troubles

I can’t decide what’s good and what’s bad
The benefits of the beasty life are profound
It’ll open me a treasure of happiness
My life will be fulfilled with all achievements
But I want nothing except my aims
I give up the joy and embrace the pains
The pains soothe me which I take for my aims
My life is affected, it can’t be normalized

But sometimes the pains do become unbearable
And I can’t stop envying those easy animal lives

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